More Thoughts on a Youth Pastor and Parents Partnership
I’m a parent now, so I get how challenging kids are. Even if you’d never physically harm them, you sometimes wish you could just “I Dream of Jeanie” them out of existence for, like, a day.
We all have moments when we say or do something we regret. Thank God there is grace for that. But I also know this: The words we say to our kids speak either life or death into their souls. So whenever you can, be a speaker of life.
I could always tell when I was working with a student whose parent was spiritually and emotionally encouraging to them. I always wondered if those parents realized how much they were a source of joy to their kid. So if you’re a parent who is intentional about encouragement: Good job. It matters!
4. I’m not nearly as influential as you are.
The youth pastor is not a teenager’s primary spiritual role model; the parent is. After over a decade of student ministry experience, I can count on one hand the students who had spiritually apathetic home lives but were lit on fire for Christ. Yet dozens of students with spiritually invested parents are still passionately proclaiming the Gospel.
A student pastor is a spark plug. Without fuel in the tank, a spark plug is just sparking flames over an empty tank. However, when parents fill a student’s spiritual tank to the brim, the Holy Spirit transforms that fuel into spiritual momentum. Often this happens through the church. Then the dynamic between a student pastor and parents becomes a powerful, energizing partnership. God uses that to transform a teen’s life for eternity.
So if you have a veteran youth pastor who knows what they’re doing? Make sure they know you support them. If the kid is a newbie who looks about 19? Also make sure they know you support them. Because the truth is, they’re on your side.
5. Your job is so hard. Let me know how I can help.
Parenting—especially during the teen years—is like trying to hit a moving target blindfolded. Youth pastors don’t have all the answers. But we can discuss what a teen’s life looks like in our world. That why we need a youth pastor and parents partnership.
I remember being honored when a parent wanted to discuss how we could partner together to pastor their child. When a pastor and parent unite to help steer a teen toward Christ, God’s power explodes in that kid’s life. And more than anything, that’s what I want for every teen who comes to church.
